The truth about gamers

Empty House

This will be a short post and I don't feel like explaining it.
Please get better soon Rachel, I love you.
It sucks to want to help and not be able to do anything.

25 things about me

The new thing of the day on Facebook is the 25 things about me survey. So here are some things about me. When people send me tedious chain mail forms I don't read them. I feel no peer pressure to fill out things that have no purpose. Sometimes I delete people from facebook for sending me crap like that.

Lets see what are some other things about me that nobody cares about. I own a shovel, and I have a favorite movie. My classic game room feels like the fortress of solitude sometimes and I like it.

Oh here's a good one. Sometimes people talk about going on mission trips to Africa and how it changes their perspective on life. One guy told me that he didn't want to eat at restaurants after going because it seems so wasteful after seeing the poverty. Personally I can't understand what makes people do crap like that. I literally can't even understand why people would go to the anus of the planet. Is it like the white mans burden kinda thing? I'm happy for what I have and I don't need to visit the AIDS capital of earth to feel better about eating a big mac.

There this was a random list of crap you didn't care about. It was absolutely pointless and a waste of your time. The next time you go to fill out a chain email or facebook survey think about this.

This message brought to you by the Brad Carrier commission for being a total dick.

Refinancing

Refinancing a house is a massive pain in the ass. I'm trying to pay the same bank slightly less money than what they already know I can afford. Why would that be difficult when they already know I can make a higher payment?

Well it is difficult and it's full of stupid road blocks for paper work nonsense. Even though it's the same bank the mortgage is already with and it's a small bank where I personally know many of the employees they want to do a whole new mortgage. I have been hunting down different paperwork for the under writers for about three weeks now.

To prove that the whole process is senseless they approved my loan before they even had all the paperwork or sent out an appraiser. The appraiser still had to come out though.

Escaping Racism Training

The title makes it sound like I'm going to talk about training people to be racists. That's funny in it's self so I left the misleading title as is.

No I'm talking about the wonders of mandatory cultural diversity training at work. There is a way to use circular logic to get out of it. First interrupt the speaker and ask if they understand racism. Then when they say yes tell them that only way to understand racism is to have already been a racist to begin with. Finally stand up and yell that you refuse to be talked down to by a racist and leave the room.

In theory this should work but in reality HR will probably send you back to apologize for being a jerk.

Finally Fast Commercial

Let me start right out by saying that I have never used whatever finallyfast.com is selling. I'm sure it's just crap software but that's not what this post is about. I think they should remake their commercial. If you haven't seen this gem that pops up on occasion when Billy Mays inst screaming at laundry to be oxi clean here's the video.



Did you catch the scene where the lady got a windows blue screen on her Mac laptop? Yeah this product isn't a BS scam at all. Anyway back to my ideas for their next commercial.

First of all they need to show that they mean fast by getting that guy who did all the micro machines commercials in the 80's to do the talking. Nothing says fast like a guy talking so fast you have no idea what he's saying. If you don't remember him here is the classic video goodness.



Next they need to ditch all this crap with people just being happy that porno is loading faster. They need some stuff to show how extreme their product is. I think they should show a laptop sitting on a desk. Then show it go flying into a wall and explode in a fireball. After that the announcer can say "That's how fast it's gonna be, your computer may actually do a suicide drag race into a wall at 100mph. ITS THAT FAST"



In the first commercial the last guy says wow my computers fast.....finally. Then it looks like he crapped a brick from the strain of thinking and says finally fast! or something like that. Anyway screw that they need to take that guy and have him google "The entire internet all at once" then this happens.








The announcer can say something like YEAH YOUR INTERNET WILL BE SO FAST IT'S GOING TO MELT YOUR FACE AND RAPE YOUR EYE SOCKETS LIKE A NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST IS COMING OUT OF THE MONITOR AND BURROWING INTO YOUR SKULL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's my version of the commercial anyway.

Colander Girls

I have a cleanliness dilemma about using the colander. Does a colander really need to be washed every time you use it? It seems gross not to wash a kitchen item after using it for cooking but is the colander an exception to the rule?

You pour boiling hot water into it which is pretty clean. The pasta just sits in it for a second and then it's done. If nothing gets stuck to the thing isn't it still clean?

I wonder about this every time I use it. More often than not I end up washing the colander but I always consider just letting it go a few uses without. Is that just strange or what?

Mario Kart

Mario Kart Wii is a good game but it's got two annoying things that bug me a lot. The first one is the commie nuke. I don't know what it's actually called but it's a blue spiked shell that only punishes the person in first place. I wouldn't complain but it's too effective. There is absolutely no defense against it and when you get hit you always lose a position or five.

The other thing is the loaded endings in the 150cc class races. If your in first the last half a lap is always a nightmare. The races get harder as you go up in kart classes which is good. What sucks is that in 150cc every damned racer seems to get a free shot at you if your in first at the end of the race. You can go from 1st place to last all within sight of the finish line. It's not isolated either it's obviously by design.

It's a fun game though I just want to finish the 150cc races without throwing my goofy steering wheel controller through the TV.

Geeky Project

Here at the offices of THE GOVERNMENT we have a lot of servers to deal with. Jim and I wanted a way to keep an eye on them at a glance. So between his cubical and mine we now have a monitor wall! It's really just a PC with triple monitors but that's what got the job done. I think it makes the office look fun with it's spiky colorful graphs.

Hate Faux News

If you needed another reason to despise the shit spewing hate mongers at Fox news here you go.

See more funny videos and Entertainment Videos at Today's Big Thing.

Picture Unrelated

Lack of communication with a small business is going to cause me never to go there again. We had to take Rachel's car to a local shop because the starter died on Monday. I know the guy doing the work is trustworthy but he's impossible to get on the phone.

It's a one man shop but he couldn't even answer a question today when I had him on the phone. Now I'm waiting for him to call back and it's never going to happen. This sucks because the guy does good work but he's loosing me as a customer after this. All I wanted to know is when I can pick the car up but now I'm flying blind.

The guy needs someone to answer the phone or get in the game and buy a headset.

I was proved wrong. He did call back and the car should be done today.

How to use Twitter

I found a fun resource about using Twitter for marketing.

www.howtousetwitterformarketingandpr.com

Twitter is a silly service. You keep telling people what your doing but they didn't want to know. If they wanted to know what you were up to why couldn't they just email or call you?

Yet everyone likes to tell people stuff so it's a popular service. I use it but I can't think of anything useful I have ever posted there.

ROFL Copter taking off

Funny picture post

I wanted to do another funny picture post. All that serious writing is overrated anyway.

Young Geeks Suck

I'm stuck in a speech class doing a group project with the most horrible people I have ever dealt with. The instructor decided it would be good to stick all of the I.T. related majors in one group. All of them but me and one other guy are younger and have little actual workplace experience. So far we are taking more time than any other group to accomplish less work. That's because nobody can stop arguing about technical issues that are not relevant to the project anyway.

I tried to keep everyone on task and get some actual work put on paper but apparently it's more important to argue about what can and can't run on an Intel Atom processor. If you were wondering, no our project has nothing to do with Intel Atom processors.

I'm just gonna show up to class drunk from now on.

Rachel got her way

Rachel decided that our dog wouldn't be so horrible if he had a little sister. It's been about a year of making that argument and I finally agreed. So now it's time to meet Harley Quinn the puppy.